"When the going gets tough...the tough get going."


"Be at your best when the best is needed."

Monday, June 24, 2013

Unexpected Outcomes

Well the big move up to Intermediate didn't quite go as planned.  I felt prepared and ready for the big day and we started off amazingly well with a 34 in dressage to sit in 3rd place...I was so pumped!!  He was very steady and rideable in the test and I really feel like our warmup method is rock solid.  It was great to show off his skills at this level and score so well. 
Then we were on to Show Jumping...here's where it all fell apart...literally.  He was a little bit rank to start the course, but I wasn't too upset with jumps 1-4.  Jump 5 was a triple bar 2 strides to a vertical, 5 strides to an oxer.  Well it was a bit of a mess and I got to the oxer in 4 1/2, but we made it through.  I overadjusted then and got him a bit backward for a rollback to a skinny and then a bending line to the triple combo.  We hit the triple on stride, so I thought, then all of a sudden I was counting 1 and a half.  He popped over the maximum oxer middle element and popped me right out of the saddle.  So a big fat E and we never made it to XC.  Obviously I was really disappointed to not finish and knew I had some work to do.  I just didn't like the feeling that I wasn't ready and I wasn't good enough.  And I struggled a lot with my confidence in the weeks after the event.  I was doubting EVERYTHING.  I decided to move back down to Prelim for Seneca in June and then see where we were.  The week of Seneca was extremely busy for work and in hindsight I shouldn't have competed this weekend.   I was in Boston for half the week and then Philly for a customer event so it was very hectic.  Plus my ride time was super early and we had to get up at 3am...not a recipe for success.  I rode terrible in dressage and was very disappointed in my test and somehow got a 33.  Show jumping was the reason I was there and I desperately wanted a smooth round.  Luckily, I think, they had the same exact triple combo set in the course, vertical 1 stride big oxer 2 strides vertical.  I walked the course several times and of course was nervous.  During warmup he was extremely testy and nappy and I was worried.  I didn't warm up enough and should've taken more time to make sure he was adjustable and listening, but chalk that up to my bad attitude.  He bolted a bit when I first got in the ring, but I wisely halted him and took my time after they blew the whistle.  I need to try and apply some of my dressage knowledge to SJ...45 seconds is a long time and I need to take advantage of that and try and settle him in before we start.  Anyway, I was really, really happy with the way the course rode.  He wasn't listening well in the turn from 1 to 2 and then I made a move at a long spot and he sort of shuffled into it but that was our only bobble.  Everything else rode exactly as I walked.  And the triple was simple...he skipped right through it.  Everything was set for a 6' takeoff and landing and I really paid attention to the striding and knew if I jumped a little shallow I had to let him roll down, but he's very easy to lengthen so if it seems long most people may need to ride and I need to just settle and if it's at all short I need to WHOA.  I made a really dumb mistake on XC and had a runout at a table...I got there on a really long stride and tried to take it at an angle to better setup for the 110° turn I had to make and I never put my left leg on.  He was right to runout...again disappointing because all of the combos rode great and it felt easy and smooth the rest of the course.  I just had a little mental blackout. 

So Seneca was a bit of a confidence boost, but I really need to figure out how to manage the mental side of the sport.  I'm still shaky and balancing riding at this level with my career has proven to be a lot harder this past year.  The plan is to move back up at MD II in July.  I'm comfortable there and I think it's the next logical place to give it a go.  I've been really focusing on training in jumping and am going to try and tackle a jumper show this week....we'll see how that goes.  I think it will help to just be able to do multiple rounds and smooth it out for confidence.  I'm going to look for more throughout the summer, but it's proving to be difficult to find them at the height I need.  My expectations have been reset now and I'm just looking one show at a time.  I really want to succeed and figure all of this out...I am trying to keep dreaming and believing....my support system is really trying to help me, but I think this is for me to figure out on my own.